Pink Eye, or A Star is Born

Inevitably, I caught Jack’s conjunctivitis. Jack is on the road to recovery, and I am on the road to squinting, itchy, swollen, crusty, watery pain. And my eye hurts, too.

On the tram ride to school with the guys, people looked at me and did a double-take. This was especially noticeable because in Switzerland nobody looks at anybody. The eye was freaking them out.

At first it was annoying. I felt like a pariah. Walking off the tram and to the school, double looks continued and I became empowered as Somebody Different. Screw them if they couldn’t deal with it. But after dropping the boys off and walking back to the tram, I tried something different. I was a star. The looks were because they thought they recognized me. I gave people a little nod and smile, letting them bask in my star glow.

But waiting for the tram, all the stardom became a little much. All I was doing was waiting for a tram, but how could I be myself with all these people around? I was always on. To alleviate the pressure, I got lost in my thoughts, which probably made me look even star cooler — a bit aloof and cerebral.

I should have about a day of stardom left. I’m seeing the doctor later and will probably start antibiotics. In the meantime, try not to stare. And call my agent if you want to consider me for your next project. My type? I’m a John Malkovich meets Jeff Goldblum with a little bit of Tom Hanks thrown in.

My Headshot

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