It was a fathers-children lunch. My friend Chris and I took our young kids — three boys and a girl — into the men’s room after lunch to go to the bathroom. The kids pee and wash their hands. And I notice a product dispenser. If it were in America, there might be an assortment of mouthwashes or temporary tattoos in this machine. If it were Germany or France, perhaps condoms. But what I see surprises even me: Why, it’s Travel Pussy.
Never having entertained this concept, I come in for a closer look. It appears to be a fabulously handy product for the weary traveling man who, I’m supposing here, really misses his wife and hasn’t really mastered the use of his hands. My friend is equally mesmerized by this product concept, until we remember we have 4 under 7 year olds washing their hands and we really don’t want to have to figure out how to explain this product to them. So I block the machine while Chris hustles them out.
Chris speaks German, and for those interested, here are the instructions for this product. I especially like that they implore the user to check water temperature before use, and also they are environmentally-minded and ask that you bring your used Travel Pussy home for disposal. That’s not going to create problems with customs or the wife.
1. Unfold Travel Pussy
2. Place a small amount of TravelPussyGel into the “vaginal opening” and spread around.
3. Turn the bag over and slowly fill with warm water. IMPORTANT: Check the temperature beforehand with your finger.
4. Rub TravelPussyGel on your penis and you are ready for a wonderful experience!
5. After use, empty Travel Pussy and discard in home garbage (please do not throw it in the toilet!).